A tale of three injuries

Dearest blog,

I regret to inform you that there will be no pictures in this post. But, I assure you, the world is better off without photographic documentation of recent events.

Incident Number 1
Jay and I have gotten far less punctual when it comes to getting out of bed when the alarm goes off. Just one more snooze we convince ourselves.... three snoozes later we're still snuggled up and denying that we have any responsibilities to attend to. As a result of our excessive snoozing, our getting ready routine becomes rather rushed. One morning, Jay headed out to the car to warm it up while I finished packing up my backpack. Right before I turned off the last light switch, I realized that we didn't have lunch! I hastened to the kitchen and grabbed my supplies:

Colby Jack Cheese
Sandwich meat
Bread
Mustard
Mayo
Knife
Cheese Slicer
Bags

I got through the bread, mayo, mustard, and meat steps quickly. Now it was time for the cheese. I have always struggled with grating or slicing the cheese. If Jay is around, this is always his job. But, Jay was not around, so I braved the cheese grater myself. Because I was rushing, I was pushing down hard on the cheese so it would slice all the way through and I was moving my hand as quickly as possible. This was a terrible combination. On slice number three, I felt the tip of my finger come in contact with the blade and thought, "oh no."  I dropped the cheese and slicer and tried to inspect my wound. Right about now is when it started hurting and bleeding. I frantically called Jay and told him to come back upstairs immediately.

He found me standing at the sink clutching my poor finger. I had no idea what to do. I didn't want to touch it for fear of further injuring myself or making it hurt worse. Jay patiently helped me wash my finger off. About two minutes into the washing and cleaning procedure, my hearing became muffled and my vision started to white out. My balance was compromised and my body temperature was climbing. I panicked. Just before you pass out is a very scary moment. I was quickly whisked away into the bathroom because my fainting spell was magnified by the paint fumes that were still residual in our apartment from a spray paint project that morning.

When all of my senses and body temperature returned to normal, we could finally assess the damage. I had, in fact, sliced the tip of my finger off. But, I did not need stitches. Although, it certainly hurt something fierce. Soon enough, I was bandaged up and as good as new! (Slightly typing handicapped because of my overly bandaged finger.)

Incident Number 2
Our landlord has a cat. I am very fond of Charlie. He is a good companion for nights that I'm home by myself while Jay is at work. One morning, when both of us were home, I went outside to find the cat. He was in his usual spot, basking in the morning sunshine on the front porch. As I climbed the two steps to the porch to go get Charlie, I heard some frantic chirping begin. I spotted the source rather quickly. What to my wondering eyes should appear? A laundry basket home to four chirping ducklings! 

Charlie was very quickly forgotten as I bolted to the back door and started up the stairs to get Jay and tell him what I had found. Needless to say, I didn't get very far. I tripped on the concrete steps outside the back door and nailed my shin. Tears quickly filled my eyes and I struggled up the stairs. As I stumbled through the door, my sweet husband saw my distress and came to my rescue.

He tried very hard to get me to explain what happened. I managed to get out that I had tripped on the concrete stairs. After that, the next sentence I could formulate was "I just wanted to tell you about the ducklings!!!"  This statement was followed by a very confused look on Jay's face. All I could keep saying was that I wanted him to see the ducklings. When the initial pain of my shin's encounter with solid rock subsided, he went downstairs with me to see the ducklings. And all was right in the world.

Incident Number 3
I don't have a particularly funny story for this one. I'll let the irony of the situation take the glory.

I cut myself with an Exacto blade while trying to get the blade guard off. Yup, true story.



Hopefully my injury streak will subside long enough so that my body can heal from the three injuries I've obtained in the past ten days. Good kharma would be appreciated.